Tag Archives: A Family in the City

A Family in the City makes the news. Don’t worry. I’m not in trouble.

Here’s something cool: I got an email earlier today from a guy named David Crary, who writes for the Associated Press. He was working on an article about the changing attitudes relating to men and masculinity and he came across my contact info through the Good Men Project.

Anyway, I got a chance to talk with him for a couple of minutes and he was kind enough to include a bit of it in his article.

Here’s a link to the article: http://www.ksl.com/?nid=255&sid=28694811

The Best Way to Argue: A How to Guide for Couples

Just for kicks, let’s say you and your partner are two different people. Even better, let’s say you’re two different people with two different personalities, childhoods, ideas, horrific unresolved emotional issues, and, in certain situations, even two different goals.

Now let’s imagine that one day, out of the clear blue sky, those things all combine into a perfect storm of disagreement. Well, if you’re going to do something, you ought to do it right. Right?

In the interests of being the best arguers ever, my wife and I have given an inordinate amount of thought to the best way to argue with one another. Here’s what we’ve learned in a few handy bullet points: Continue reading The Best Way to Argue: A How to Guide for Couples

Talking About Racism With the Kids!

talking to kids about racism, race, racism, sexism, a family in the city, afamilyinthecity,

Years ago, back when we first brought my daughter home from the hospital, all swaddled and tiny, I remember thinking what every parent probably thinks: “I can’t wait until she’s old enough for me to tell her all about racism!”

What a fool I was! I should’ve been looking forward to talking to her about racism AND sexism.


As an adult, I understand that my skin, class, and gender give me a leg up in the world; that racism is a system—a cultural ill—as much as it’s any random individual’s  lazy reliance on hurtful stereotypes. When I was in elementary school, I didn’t know much of anything about racism beyond “prejudice is bad” and “Don’t use The Racist Word We Don’t Use”. I also knew a lot of other racist words, but didn’t really get that they were racist or that I “Wasn’t Supposed To Use Them”. That’s mostly because I didn’t actually know what racism was. All boiled down, I thought it meant slavery, sitting at the back of the bus, and being mean to a person because of their skin color. Full stop. Continue reading Talking About Racism With the Kids!

A Family in the City News

Hey, maybe you’ve enjoyed reading this blog because you think I’m brilliant and handsome! Maybe you read this blog because you feel like you deserve to be severely punished for secret infractions that only you know about and the dreck that spews out of my keyboard is the only thing that does it for you. Maybe you’re my mom and you’ll read anything I write because you love me (hi mom!).

Regardless of the chain of events that brings you to A Family in the City, you’ll be either excited, angry, sad, or emotionally blank to know that you’ll now be able to find more of my inane ramblings over at The Good Men Project. That’s because I’m the new editor of their Marriage section!

My initial introduction and call for submissions went up a couple of days ago and a new article, The Best Way to Argue (A how-to for couples) just went up yesterday afternoon.  You’ll also be able to read lots of other writers opining on marriage stuff.

So, let’s say you’re either married or you’re in a long-term co-habitating type of relationship. Let’s say if you’re not that you either know someone who is married, or you don’t and you’re curious what all this marriage business is. Well, if any of those things describe you, you’ll be either excited, angry, sad, or emotionally blank to know that I’ll have a weekly post, right here at A Family in the City, with links to all the articles I’ll be publishing in the Marriage Section!

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Joyous Kwanzaa, or Season’s Greetings!


Having Traditions vs. Being Traditional

Ah, Thanksgiving.  Family.  Food.  Football.  Five day weekend.  It’s almost upon us.  Actually, if I’m being honest, I’ll admit that it was never my favorite holiday as a kid.  No offense to those that love it.  It just never was my own personal favorite.  What does it have that regular days don’t?  Let’s go through the list, shall we? Continue reading Having Traditions vs. Being Traditional

A Family in the City & Boston Explorers

I’m excited to announce some big changes to the blog!  I’ll be dividing A Family in the City into two separate websites.  This will allow the blogs to be more consistently useful and interesting to you, my favorite readers!

A Family in the City will now be dedicated full time to posts about family life, kid stuff, and parenting.  This space will feature posts about the hopes and fears parents have, and the kinds of decisions we have to make as parents to successfully guide our kids as they navigate childhood.

Boston Explorers, the new site, can be found at bostonexplorers.com.  It’ll focus on our family’s quest to discover the city.  So, while we’re exploring, I’ll share what we learn about Boston’s history, architecture, art, and culture.  It’ll include reviews of restaurants and interesting shops.  I’ll keep on the lookout for the easiest and best ways to make use of the most well known attractions in Boston as well as reporting out on the hidden, less famous gems we find.

All the content that related to Boston will still be available here on A Family in the City under the Archived category (look in the sidebar to the right), but any new Boston-related posts will be on the Boston Explorers blog.

So, if you like the parenting stuff, keep up with A Family in the City.  If you like the Boston stuff, keep up with Boston Explorers.  If you like both, keep up with both.  If you like neither, keep quiet and don’t tell anyone!

Thanks for reading!

A parent’s job is to protect their kids. Except when it’s not.

One of the biggest challenges of being a parent (after learning the self-control necessary to not eat all the Halloween candy after bedtime) is finding the balance between protecting the kids and letting them make their own mistakes.  For example, my kids have made the mistake of not hiding all their left over Halloween candy.  I believe in using natural consequences.

Candy isn't good for kids anyway, right?
Candy isn’t good for kids anyway, right?

Continue reading A parent’s job is to protect their kids. Except when it’s not.